Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I'm set

I think I've decided for sure to postpone the triathlon training for a few weeks. Vegas doesn't seem possible financially and mental health-wise, so for the sake of my sanity, I'm going to be a quitter and put off yet another thing I set out to do. Yes, I have no motivation.

Part of the reason (besides not wanting to blow $400 on something I have no desire to do) I'm backing out is because I'm just not accustomed to working out 6 times a week. Right now, there are so many things I want to do and have been doing that I don't want to have to worry about making up a workout because I needed a break or spent the day snowboarding. I'm not opposed to going to the gym/for a run/bike ride 6 times a week. That's cool, although I know I'm going to have to work up to it from about the 4 days of exercise I currently get, most of them not at the gym and not structured, but rather random sports/classes with friends. But the main point is that I'm too stressed out by this, logistically and monetarily, and therefore it's not fun.

Someone on 3FC said somewhere that motivation doesn't necessarily come before action and therefore one should force themselves to work out even if they're not motivated. I should really abide by that since it would make this Vegas training possible. I'm just not willing to do that quite yet. I don't want to constantly feel behind on my workouts and worried that I won't be able to finish the triathlon solely because I have other things going on in my life, such as soccer, or snowboarding, or broomball. Or a night out camping. The triathlon was supposed to be something that I did for fun and to give me a varied but structured workout plan that I could follow. Instead, it's this big ball of stress. And when I feel like I can't do something or have any sort of doubt in myself, I cave and quit altogether and think, "I may as well not even try." That's been the case here. I feel so overwhelmed, and I absolutely hate that feeling. It's also not very conducive to being positive and training hard to have fun. So yeah, I quit. At least for a little while.

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